Amaechi... gay.
I googled John Amaechi and found some astonishing facts that separate him from the rest of the NBA:
Career Highlights:
- Named to the 1999-2000 NBA All-Interview First Team
- Scored the first basket in Miami's AmericanAirlines Arena, and the first NBA points in the new millenium on 1/2/00
- Tied for sixth in media voting for the NBA's Most Improved Player Award in 1999-2000
- One of only seven undrafted players to start an NBA game in 1999-2000
Is that serious? Can't you just see a team of interns struggling to meet the 4 highlight minimum set forth by the site's editors? Every one of those sucks. Now we can add "Most irrelevant person ever to come out of the closet."
Career Highlights:
- Named to the 1999-2000 NBA All-Interview First Team
- Scored the first basket in Miami's AmericanAirlines Arena, and the first NBA points in the new millenium on 1/2/00
- Tied for sixth in media voting for the NBA's Most Improved Player Award in 1999-2000
- One of only seven undrafted players to start an NBA game in 1999-2000
Is that serious? Can't you just see a team of interns struggling to meet the 4 highlight minimum set forth by the site's editors? Every one of those sucks. Now we can add "Most irrelevant person ever to come out of the closet."
posted by Dick Dastardly at
3:16 PM
18 Comments:
scathing.
like youre not gonna read his book.
who would be your top 5 closet homosexual professional athletes? I'm goin with Tony Romo, Carlos Beltran, Sergio Garcia, Dwayne Wade, and Freddy Adu. I'm prepared to defend each one of these choices.
EXCELLENT question.
I dont think Romo or Adu are all that gay, wade is a little less of a stretch also, but i can totally see it with beltran and sergio. also, im gonna need some defense of those choices, mostly cuz im bored.
I could take the easy way out and go with johnny weir, arantxa sanchez-vicario, brian boitano, chamique holdsclaw, and of course paul o'neill, but i'll give you five legit people.
1. Barry Zito - kind of has that gay/pretty boy look about him, is friends with John Mayer, signed with the San Francisco Giants not just for the money (know what im sayin)
2. Landon Donovan - plays like a pussy, had a chance to cash in on some high profile chicks following the '02 world cup and instead hooked up with bruce arena
3. Calvin Murphy - just kidding.
3. Mike Tyson - would anything about tyson surprise you at this point? really though, anything? does hooking up with dudes sound out of the realm of possibility? he probably already did in jail. plus he does have a really lithpy voithe.
4. Tony Parker - Longoria is just a front, why do you think they haven't gotten married yet?
5. Jesper Parnevik - look at him, seriously.
-Note: Up until two weeks ago i was convinced Peyton Manning was gay, then i found out he's married. I just figured that he has been one of the highest profile athletes of the past five years and you never see or hear anything about his women. He's still suspect until we see a leaked sex tape.
ok you can't really say any european athlete is gay, because to americans all europeans might as well be gay. which is to say, the gaydar gets distorted as it goes west to east across the pond
what if shaq was gay
jeter and a rod are not so much gay as entirely constituted by the AIDS virus. not that there's anything wrong with that.
do you think wilt chamberlain ever had sex with men. i mean chances are...
I'd throw Lance Armstrong into the closeted athletes list. Those pictures of him with McConaughey and Gyllenhaal looked pretty cosy.
Amaechi is really only a story b/c there is no other big news the week after the SB and b/c the NBA is notoriously homophobic. He's an ex-player who was good not great when he did play. Yawn.
Ricks,
Are you seriously saying John Amaechi was a "good" player? He was consistently his team's 9th best player, which puts about 300 guys who played during his run in NBA ahead of him. If not for his recent declaration of homosexuality, he would have been deader to the masses than the NHL.
I agree that foreign athletes are more likely to appear gay to Americans. It's easy to say Europeans are gay just because they are naturally more flamboyant in comparison to juiced up, alpha-male Americans.
Here's my list:
1. Tiki Barber - I know he's married with kids, but his mannerisms definitely qualify him as a questionable Streisand. Besides, he quit football at the height of his popularity to do the news, a business where gayness is off the charts. Interesting...
2. T.O. - Yes, it is easy to point out athletes who demonstrate unusual behavior over and over again as potential fudge-packers. But Mr. Owen's is in a league of his own. Attempted suicide? Just a masculine gay man who was struggling to deal with his sexual tendencies. Constant battles with coaches and QBs? Overcompensating. Maybe all of this nonsense will stop if he just comes out of the closet and accepts his secondary role... as a receiver.
3. Kaz Matsui - Since the day he signed with the Mets, I thought he was suspect. His absurdly bright orange hair matched his absurdly bright orange arm bands. He also fielded ground balls awkwardly - he doesn't bend over as fluidly as other middle infielders.
He was actually not that terrible when he first played for the Magic. I used to watch them all the time back in Lakeland and he was pretty serviceable, kinda like a Bison "dont call me Brian Williams" Dele (but a little worse).
I'm actually surprised this isn't a bigger story. I mean, this is kind of an interesting issue, unlike, say, Barbaro's fight to live.
I agree on Lance Armstrong. Also, on top of being kind of homosexual, he always comes off as a really big prick.
I think you're dead wrong on TO, not gay just a nutcase. I read an article from super bowl week about him attending Shaq's Sexy 60 party and telling everyone he's looking for a "sexy 6 footer" (well, I assumed he meant female...but then again)
1. Tony Romo = Homo - smiles too much. had jessica simpson then carrie underwood. no straight man would leave either of them (nick lachay = gay)
2. Freddy Adu loves to pack poo - no straight male born and raised in the United States plays soccer...no one (care to comment Trout?)
3. Carlos Beltran = gay... waxes eyebrows/has highlights/named carlos/keeping superior mets center fielding young star on bench/ bangs dudes
4. Sergio Garcia - slept with several LPGA golfers after mistaking them for men.
5. D Wade - this one i actually believe. I mean l.b.s. (let's be serious), the guy is rich, famous, arguably the best player in the nba, lives in miami, doesn't look like a mutant...BUT have you ever heard of him linked to a girl? Have you ever seen a picture of him with a girl?? I spent 20 minutes looking on the web and couldn't find a single link to indicate wade is straight. the dude is either asexual or straight up gay.
i forgot that romo had carrie underwood too. i have to say, im a big fan of hers, i think she's on the all-time underrated hot chick list.
first of all, adu was born in ghana, not the US. plus, aren't the kids on the high school soccer team generally hated cuz they all get hot chicks? this is how it was in the south at least. i think people generally hold soccer's european roots against dudes that play soccer here, which isnt particularly fair (see above posts for explanation). although cristiano ronaldo being a huge gay symbol doesnt exactly help my defense.
just cuz landon donovan is gay, doesnt mean the rest of american soccer players are.
suspension of commenting privileges is imminent if the term "lbs" is used again. unless youre talking about pounds.
also, wade is married to some girl from his high school. he was married while he was at marquette if im not mistaken.
sergio and beltran are still prime candidates though. although, what are you talking about with your "keeping superior mets center fielding young star on bench" comment? is that lastings milledge?
Beltran? Gay? What makes you say that? His hairstyle is virtually identical to A Rods (I guess that wasn't much of a defense). Is it because he's quiet? Is it because he appears emotionless? If that's the case, then JD Drew must be gay. I just remembered that Beltran is a switch hitter. I guess you're right about him... gay.
Legend, seriously, enough about Lastings Milledge. You've seen him play maybe three times. I've watched about 70 ABs, and I saw his first HR in person. I wish he was the next great thing, but he just is not. He's the next Jay Payton. Period. He'll be a starting OF in the MLB, but he will never approach Beltran's production. I really can't believe smart guys like Buster Olney are still pumping him up as a hot prospect. They need to trade him right now.
Hey, Legend, what about Ken Griffey, Jr.? There is some gay potential there, too.
no straight man would leave either of them (nick lachay = gay)
Legend, Are you really saying that you would stay with Jessica Simpson even though she may be a moron? Especially when you can leave her and immediatly get women just as hot as her or hotter? Hello Vanessa Mannillo!
Also, DWade is definitely married. I believe his wife is having their 2nd kid right now. Also he hooked up with Hoopz last year, you know like getting Flava Flav's seconds. Dick Dastardly, I know you had a thing for Ms. Hoopz back in the day...
Ricks - i wouldnt leave jessica simpson for anyone until she turns 28 and her looks begin to decline (i can put up with the retardum for a few years).
Dick - the only gay thing about George Kenneth Griffey Jr. is you searching for topless picutres of him on google last summer. If ya make another comment about him like that, I will hunt you down and slice your achilles. Btw, true story, I had a nightmare about 3 days ago that Jr. tested positive for a non-abolic steroid. He wasn't suspended, but his reputation was tarnished. I think I woke up crying.
i know he's not an athlete, but i'd like to add the Legend to my list of closeted people after sharing that story with us. thanks
"i know he's not an athlete"
trout - legend played for the greatest high school football program in in the hudson valley region of new york state, and lettered in 2 other sports. bite your tongue
i noticed you refuted nothing pertaining to the accusation of homosexuality directed at you in my comment. but at least you cleared up the question of your having once participated in athletics.
disputing that would be like disputing the existence of unicorns...unicorns aren't real and legend isn't gay
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